Welcome to the Human Prototype blog, a space where the past and present converge to showcase the evolution of a life in progress. Inspired by my TEDx talk, "I am a Prototype," this blog is part of a broader journey of transformation through journaling, capturing the essence of living as a perpetual prototype. Each week, during 2024, I reviewed my archives from 2016, contrasting journal scans filled with drawings against the backdrop of my current experiences.
Doubts, Joy and Pests
Then: July 25- 31, 2016
That was a busy week as showcased by the busy bee!
A few highlights:
- My niece Bianca was born!
- I did 1 yoga class, 2 swimming sessions and 3 crossfit classes: the energy!!!!!!!
- And I’ve just realized that I was already singing in video calls back then. That seems to have been a feature of mine for longer than I can remember!
A few pictures from that week:
Now: July 22-28, 2024
A Nice Busy Week Filled with Doubt, Joy, and Pests!
Doubt: This week, old wounds of inadequacy resurfaced. Even though I recognize these are just remnants from the past, my body still reacts strongly to even the slightest triggers. For example, during a working group call, I felt unworthy of sharing my opinion, despite having a strong viewpoint on the topic. I was torn between feeling unworthy of taking up space and wanting to shout my opinion from the rooftops. It all culminated in tears when the host asked for my input three minutes before the end of the call. However, I managed to explain my feelings and shared my opinion, though I can't remember exactly what I said due to being overwhelmed. It was just another lesson to show up for myself more —one of many lessons these days.
Joy: On Wednesday, I received a text from a friend from the US: "I am coming to London on Friday, are you free to see a musical?" Of course, I was! After eating delicious bao buns in Soho, we saw "Hello Dolly." It was the most magical thing I have seen in a long time. The acting, costumes, stage, and story were awe-inspiring. Imelda Staunton, the main actress, was impressive. It felt so real, which can be hard to achieve in musical theatre, as it often feels exaggerated and fake to me. I cried a bit and sang along to "It’s so nice to have you back where you belong […] You’re still glowin’, you’re still crowin’, You’re still goin’ strong…” I sang this to myself as I am staring a new phase of my life, reconnecting with my authentic self in a job where I can be more me! Hurray to Dolly!
More Joy: Over the weekend, I participated in a two-day training course called "The Shaman’s Pathway," where I was introduced to the basic principles and practices of cross-cultural and classical shamanism. I danced, sang, connected with spirit, and practiced shamanic healing. This was incredibly energizing and affirming. I highly recommend it to anyone curious about these practices. We were about 15 participants from diverse backgrounds, ranging from curious newcomers to seasoned practitioners, and everyone was equally welcomed and engaged in learning. A weekend filled with learning and joy!
Pests: Are pests a good thing or a bad thing? Over the weekend, I had a couple of very vivid dreams involving pests. In one dream, I discovered an ant nest in the wall at home. I was advised to let them be, and I wasn't too bothered by it. Then I turned around and saw a cardboard box filled with mice. Two of them were outside the box fighting; one even used its tail to whip the other, which made me giggle. My mum appeared in the dream and thought the mice were cute and that we should keep them.
In another dream, I had a wound on my chest, and flies and worms were coming out of it. It was a little annoying but not too stressful. I put a band-aid on it to go on a date and later removed it to extract the remaining bugs. Then a snake came out, and that was it. Everything got cleared. Again, there was no fear, no stress, just vibes. I haven't remembered my dreams in a long time and would have preferred different ones to remember, but hey, what can you do?
I actually asked ChatGPT to help me understand the meaning of those dreams, but just talking to ChatGPT as soon as I woke up helped me remember them. So that's my tip to you: start a dream journal with ChatGPT!
Companion Links: Extend Your Journey
- The Way of the Shaman: The Work of Michael and Sandra Harner (1 hour documentary):
- Sing with me - Hello Dolly (Barbra Streisand with Louis Armstrong)
Spread the Word
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Together, let's embrace the beauty of becoming, the intrigue of what was, and the promise of what is yet to come.
